A real example of how immorality destroys lives

When I look around me at all of the marvelous things that this modern age has produced, I often think of how awesome mankind can be when we put our minds together and work for the good of those around us. Looking at the huge skyscrapers and modern technology one can be overwhelmed at the power of mankind. Some people seem to work night and day in order to make our lives more comfortable and convenient. From this point of view our modern world is a great place to live. As you know, there is always „the other side of the coin”. As I look at this same modern world from another angle, the angle of morality, I see just how confused people are and how we are destroying ourselves from the inside out. Using medical technology we try to save and prolong life as much and as long as possible yet with the constant promotion of immorality, we are destroying ourselves at an alarming rate. As an example, we work hard to protect the limb that we are standing on while are the same time we attack the trunk of the tree that the limb is attached to with all of our power. I grew up in the 80’s and 90’s in the USA with all the great commodities of the modern age, including the immoral mentality of the modern age. The age of pluralism and relativism, that is, everything is acceptable, if it feels good do it, its your life so do what you want with it. I believed these “sayings/teachings” with all of my heart like the rest of the people around me, because we did not know of another way of life, this mentality was pounded into our minds night and day through the media. Based on this mentality, I lived my life to fulfill my personal desires. This happened until I reached the age of 18. At the age of 18 my life was totally transformed when I met the Lord Jesus Christ for the first time in my life through the pages of the Holy Bible. I realized that living your life solely to fulfill your own desires is incorrect and that there is another, better way of life. Those who promote the modern mentality of fulfilling your desires at any cost rarely ever tell you of the consequences of this lifestyle. We know very well that every action has a consequence (that is how God has ordered things). We have the privilege of choosing the actions that we take but God gives the consequences. I can speak to this subject because I have lived on both sides of the fence. I lived a life far from the presence of God, seeking to fulfill all of my desires, while now I live in the presence of the Lord daily, seeking to carry out all of His desires as written in His Word, the Bible. The difference between these two ways of life is like night and day or life and death. I have written all of this as an introduction to the subject that I would like to tackle in this article of how immorality destroys lives. This is the story of a couple whom I know but their example is being repeated on a daily basis in this modern world.

First of all, this couple grew up in the midst of a society that does not follow the teachings of the Bible in the area of sexuality. As the Bible explains very clearly, the sexual relationship is only to be practiced between a husband and his wife within the confines of marriage. There are many examples of this in the Bible so I will not use all of them. Instead, I have selected a few references for my argument. The first example is found in the book of beginnings, Genesis:

For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.  And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed (Genesis 2:24-25)

We can see clearly from these verses that the man and his wife are joined together in the covenant of marriage first, and then they become one flesh through the sexual relationship. God confirms this teaching in the New Testament in the book of Hebrews:

Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge. (Hebrews 13:4)

The word “fornicator” comes from an interesting word in the Greek language. “Pornos” is the word from Greek that is translated “fornicator”. This is where we get our modern word “pornography”. Fornication means any sexual activity that is practiced outside of the confines of marriage. This includes both physical and mental activity (such as lust, pornography, and masturbation). God promises us that He will judge fornicators. We can figure out some of that judgment from the verse given. Fornicators do not hold their future marriages in honor or the marriages of others. The opposite of honor is shame so fornicators bring shame upon themselves and upon others through their immoral activities. We also see God’s judgment through the fact that fornicators defile their marriage bed (and themselves). When a person who has lived a life of fornication finally does marry, he/she brings all of those dirty experiences to his/her marriage bed as well as the memories that can appear at any moment. There is one other form of judgment that I would like to mention, even though it is not written in the text. I am talking about STD’s. Fornicators are always at risk of being infected with an STD and when compared to those who do not practice fornication, the risk of the fornicators is extremely high. In the USA, in 2006, there were 1 million new cases of Chlamydia, which of course is an STD. Could you imagine how it would feel if your were the cause of your future spouse’s STD because you lived in fornication before marriage? Your spouse will suffer double because of your immoral lifestyle. First of all he/she will suffer because of the STD that you blessed him/her with and also because of your previous dirty experiences that caused you to receive the STD. Could you imagine having to look at your child who has to suffer a lifetime because of the negative effects of your STD? I cannot imagine such heartache. This is a major problem in the modern world, the fact that those who promote immorality do not promote the negative effects of immorality. They only want to tell you of the pleasures and not the consequences. I am so glad that God is not like immoral people. He always warns us of the negative effects of our actions before we fall into the trap of the consequences. He also teaches us how to act correctly so that we can experience the positive effects of being obedient to Him.

The couple that I mentioned earlier lived immoral lives in fornication before they got married which brought many negative consequences into their short lived marriage. First of all they entered into marriage with a lot of experience in the area of the sexual relationship, both with each other and with other previous partners. Because of this „experience” they entered into marriage with a lack of trust which led to many heated arguments. It was so bad that after their child was born the husband accused the wife of infidelity and took her to court, claiming that the child was not his. This demonstrates a lack of trust from both sides. There was no ground for trust because both the husband and wife had participated in the sexual relations with others. He was always conscious of her past and she was always conscious of his past. Neither of them trusted the other and neither of them deserved to be trusted. I really believe with all of my heart that the whole situation could be avoided if both of the partners would have entered into marriage as virgins, without all of the previous “experiences”. We can clearly see proof of the fact that not following God’s plan will bring negative effects and consequences in our lives and marriages. The modern world’s response to the above tragedy is “that’s life, you just have to endure it and move on”. Many of those who promote the modern lifestyle of immorality know of the consequences but they do not want to reveal this to you because if you were well informed in the beginning with the results and consequences then you would choose God’s way instead of the way of the modern world. There was still hope for this couple even though they had been through so much and were in the midst of the storm of problems. This is the beauty of God and His Word, even when we are the cause of our problems because of disobedience to God and His Word, He will still intervene and show us what to do. He is ready, willing, and able to help us, by taking the terrible situation and turning it around for good, if we will come to Him, seek His help, and follow His advice. God reveals this to us in His Holy Word, in Romans:

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28)

There are two key words that I would like to emphasize in this text. The first one is love. God works all things (even bad things) for the good of those who love Him. How do we know when a person loves God? Love is an action that is shown through our obedience. If we love God then we will obey Him. The other key word is “will”, God’s will to be more specific. When we come to God seeking advice, if we love Him, then we will place His will above our own, being ready to do whatever He asks of us. This is the person whom God works all things for the good. The above mentioned young couple could have come to God for help and He would have forgiven them of their terrible mistakes and then they would have been able to forgive each other. Instead, they chose a nasty divorce with much hatred and fighting over who will take the innocent child. Many people seem to overlook the third victim of the modern world’s way of thinking. I am talking about the innocent child who will suffer all of his life because of immorality (not even his own). Each child needs to be raised in a healthy, happy family made up of both mother and father together. Unfortunately, this young child will grow up in a family where his mother hates his father and the other way around. Instead of love, he sees hatred. As I said earlier, God is always ready to help us even in the most difficult of situations. There is still hope for this couple even though they have been through so much pain. John’s epistle (letter) says the following:

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9)

God is ready to forgive us of our sins and cleanse us from all of our dirty thoughts and actions if we will just humbly come to Him, confessing our sins. To confess means to agree with so when you confess your sins you agree with God that what you did was sin and you turn away from it. If they would have only known this then their futures could have been different.

The cycle of sin is vicious, always promising something better the next time but actually causing even more harm than before. Instead of running to their Creator for comfort, these two young people ran to others immoral relationship in their quest for comfort. As the saying goes, “they jumped out of the frying pan and into the oven” going from one bad situation to another one that became even worse. You have probably seen this happen before. She met another handsome young man who seemed to want to meet all of her needs for attention and “love” while she met his “sexual” needs. Everything was perfect (so they thought) for a short period of time. They decided that this time would be different and this marriage would last. Once they were married, things began to change very quickly and the cycle began to repeat itself once again. I cannot figure out why people believe that if they do things the same way that they did the first time the results will be different. In most situations in life, people seem to learn from their mistakes yet in relations with the opposite sex people do the same thing over and over again thinking that the results will be different. In fact this is the result of the modern mentality in the area of sexuality. Once again we need to return to the Holy Scripture of the Bible in order to learn what to do and what not to do:

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. (Galatians 6:7)

Living in sin will always bring negative consequences in a person’s life. If you do not learn from your mistakes in the area of sexuality or if you do not avoid the mistakes all together by being obedient to the Word of God then you know what you can expect every single time that you get involved with the opposite sex (if you do not change your ways). As I wrote earlier, sin traps us in a vicious cycle and will not let us out. Our only hope for escape is through the help of the Lord Jesus Christ. While the modern mentality brings slavery upon us the mentality that God offers us gives us freedom. Jesus Christ Himself lays out the plan of action that will bring us freedom from slavery to sin:

So Jesus was saying to those Jews who had believed Him, “If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine;  and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.” (John 8:31-32)

As you have read in the previous verses, true freedom from sin exists and we can have it if we will remain in Jesus’ Word, which is the Bible (from cover to cover). The verb “to remain” means to study with the purpose of understanding and of course application. This is what a true disciple of Jesus Christ does on a daily basis. The word “disciple” means one who studies, applies, and follows. If we will put Jesus’ calling into action then we will know the Truth (the Word of God) and by living according to the Word of God we will be free from slavery to sin, choosing to please God constantly. The cycle of sin can be broken by the power of Jesus Christ.

In conclusion, this sad story of this couple could have been avoided from the very beginning if they would have known and followed God’s plan. Instead of listening to God and following His plan, they chose to follow the modern worldview and its plan and as a result they have paid a terrible price. Even in the midst of all of their marital problems, they could have turned to the Lord and asked for His help and He would have immediately intervened and turned the situation around both for them and their innocent child. It is not by chance that God continually repeats the phrase “do not be deceived” in the pages of His Holy Word because people are so easily deceived by the “wisdom” of the age that they live in. Even though the wisdom of this modern age teaches things that lead to slavery to sin and lack of happiness people are deceived into following it on a daily basis, even though they have been burned by it in the past. It is not by chance that the divorce rate in the USA is almost 50%. That just shows us how easily people are influenced by the mindset of the modern age when it comes to sexual immorality. One of the many good things about God is the fact that He will never deceive us, ever. God tells you from the very beginning how things will be and then He allows you to choose which path you want to take, either good or bad. The modern world on the other hand, is the king of deception, constantly trying to trick you into believing its lies. God knows how the world works and because of that He has given us His Holy Word to enlighten us and expose the deception of the world so that we can make the right choice and avoid all the pain and suffering. Our job is to obey the Word of God and watch the great things that will happen. Why not work together and fight against the lies and deception of this modern world’s view of sexuality so that we can offer a bright future to the coming generations.

3 comments on “A real example of how immorality destroys lives

  1. This is a great article, be encouraged to share more of this light and truth to the world. I can relate that trying to comfort myself with immorality is not the answer. Going to God and receiving by faith all the comfort and peace you need is the answer to what ails the world.

  2. Great article! I’d like to get more information on the definition of “fornicator” – does it really include physical and mental activity? Meaning that if a given person thought in their head (before marriage to anyone) of someone with lust etc, does that defines the person as no longer virgin?
    Also, please help me get resources on this topic, I’m doing a research about the effects of immorality, mustrubration, lust etc…. A
    Also would like to clearly define the term Virgin, as in physical state not mind state. I.e: when is it that a person becomes no longer a virgin? When there was a thought with Porno nature?(which could mean that a 13 year old can think dirty and therefore no longer a virgin even though never even held a girls hand before) Or when there was an a sleep over with “fooling around”(meaning no penetration with the sexual organs) etc….
    This is a huge debate in e mids of current Christian yoIuth, which serves as a moral allowance for youth to be okay with certain things while not okay with other etc…
    Please Help me on this topic and more importantly: It is crucial to serve data with citing from preferably Bible or other credible sources.

    It would be much appreciated.

    Thank you.

  3. Pingback: Love or Lust, does it really matter? | Erik and Elena Brewer's Weblog

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